We haven’t talked about parenting on this site for quite some time. Do you miss it? Do you wish we’d bring our Real Moms series back? While I’ve stuck mostly to all things design, I was asked by MyDomaine to contribute to their May Motherhood series. I decided to do the article after I alluded to my current thoughts on motherhood in this Instagram post and it had the most comments I’ve seen all year! Seems I might have been on to something.
So I figured if I was going to do it, I might as well really open up about how I’ve felt about motherhood in these first three years. So I got rurl real. I don’t think my story is a-typical, but I definitely think my kind of experience is the most swept under the rug story. Check out the article here. I’m quite interested to hear if it resonates with you.
In the meantime, I’m looking forward to a low-key, quiet weekend before June gets going with a vengeance. Yup, I just said June. Half the year is gone. Let that sink in for a second. Funny how things start to slow down this time of year, but the time also flies during the summer. I’m determined to make the most of every moment (it’s basically my theme for this 10th Anniversary year).
The Future Perfect has had a house in LA for a while now (in Elvis’ house of all places), and they’ve recently opened an apartment in San Francisco. I think I might need to go see it this weekend.
And this vintage furniture collection has me swwooonning hard.
And a neutral home after my own color-phobic heart.
What I plan to drink all weekend (if it gets above 60 in San Francisco).
I love a good cheese plate and this one is seriously gorgeous.
And here’s what I plan to make for breakfast. And maybe lunch too.
For some reason, my first nursery for Carter is trending. I did love that room.
In other, non-design related news:
Are you watching Ellen’s trip to see the mountain gorillas of Rwanda on Instagram? Srsly, you should. It’s so moving.
Have you seen the crazy story of a 20-something who lived in an NYC hotel & tricked the city’s elite into believing she was a successful socialite? It’s a fascinating read.
This new woman-owned company is both revolutionizing the tampon and offering a great example of turning a great idea into a successful startup.
Everything at JCrew is 25% off. I consider this a public service announcement.
And if you’ve missed a few other things around here:
My recent list of favorite things on Eye-Swoon.
The complete tour of the Sunset Bungalow on Brit & Co
I’m HIRING! We’re looking for the ideal summer intern. Deadline to apply is 5pm THIS MONDAY, JUNE 4. Get all the deets HERE.
Your “whine and moan” is music to my ears. THANK YOU. Solidarity from Sacramento!
Reading your My Domaine article was finally hearing somebody put into words about how I feel about being a mom. Like, phew, I’m not crazy! I’m constantly missing my pre-kid life, but I can’t say that to people without them then thinking that I don’t love my boys more than anything.
The MyDomaine article is actually how I found you! I loved your honesty and I knew you were the kind of woman (and site!) I wanted to keep in touch with.
I’m not a mother yet, and while I want to have kids (someday) I am nearly positive I am going to have similar thoughts and feelings that you do. I cannot tell you how refreshing it was to hear your feelings about motherhood. I felt like you literally reached into my soul and pulled out my thoughts and feelings. I’ve always felt guilty and selfish about feeling that way, and that I’d be a shitty parent because of it. Reading your article made me not feel like such an ass hole about those thoughts for once. Thank you so much for being brave enough to put your honest thoughts out there.
“But do you see what I just did there? I felt it necessary to qualify my experience. Caveat it because it doesn’t fit into what motherhood is supposed to look like. I don’t feel like I’m supposed to be feeling.”
THIS. Your essay rung so true with me. In April, I went to DC for a policy conference, and took off an extra 2 to visit all my friends there. In May, I did a weekend in upstate NY with some other friends- two weekends in two months, and I felt like I needed to justify it to everyone around me (minus husband who is so awesome and supportive). But those weekends of the little “freedoms” mean so much, and are so re-energizing.
Wondering if I want to do it all over again as we contemplate a second child, bring up a lot of fear, and make me simultaneously want to fast forward 18 years from now when my kids will be out of the house, and also remind myself to enjoy this time- because I do LOVE my girl.
Yes, the caveat!
I’d be surprised if you weren’t getting hateful comments (not because you deserve them, but because it’s the internet), but I wanted to tell you that I really, really appreciate your honesty in that piece. It also scares me, though, because my husband and I are planning to try to have a child soon (because he really wants one), and I’ve never wanted one. People have said, “Everyone who has one says it’s great!” and I’m like, “But no one is allowed to say that it’s not, especially women, without being demonized as bad parents. And a kid is permanent, so you can’t just send it back if you realize motherhood is not for you!” The perspective of real women who regret becoming mothers to any extent is really difficult to find, so thank you for sharing yours.